
Here in the UK, we are fortunate that our government is very supportive of poverty, they have even put together a package of generous policies that incentivise ordinary tax payers: it’s a scheme where you pay in installments with a built-in guarantee of getting absolutely nothing back. A welcome move that ensures almost anyone can now become poor with hardly any effort at all. There’s never been a better time to be poor.
Iain Duncan Smith has put together a generous and useful additional package of support that will successfully remove that stubborn remaining income in the form of ghastly lifeline benefits, so you needn’t put up with being unfortunately able to make those ends meet a moment longer, thanks to the genius of Mr Duncan Smith’s fair and much needed cuts and sanctions. Politics with principles. Good old-fashioned Tory principles.
And what better way to guarantee your highly privileged status of vagabondage and not having a job than to make sure you are so busy being engaged in a fight for basic survival that you can’t be bothered with being incentivised to look for work. We all know that deep joy which utter exhaustion, sinking despair, deprivation and absolute demotivation brings. Yes, it’s a nice rest, for an increasing elite of paupers and vagabonds. That earns you another sanction – it’s the perfect poverty cycle of choice for those of us with such high aspirations to have low aspirations.
Some have criticised this indulgent nothing for something culture, but a government spokesperson, Mr Dickensian, said that poor people deserve the chance to further themselves into a dead end. Mr Cameron said this week that Labour were to blame for cutting poverty, but under the Conservatives, thanks to their special austerity measures for the poor, the economy is working like it should and poverty is now higher than it’s been since records began.
The good news is that being poor costs absolutely nothing. All it takes is a little know-how.
Once people see the benefits of malnutrition, rickets and scurvy, and many other low budget, value Victorian age diseases, I’m sure they will be inspired by their simple chic appeal. The growing popularity of being very hungry has enticed many these past four years. The ease by which malnutrition can be acquired under this generous government, who are making poverty a truly thrilling once in a lifetime opportunity, a must-have, has been welcomed and hailed as the new poor law come-back, the return of a Golden Age for the Conservatives. It’s a very welcomed return of nostalgic, ever so quaint Social Darwinist Tory principles.
However, critics have said that being poor is not the cause of poverty, and claim that poverty specialists have manufactured the statistical evidence. Genuinely poor people have to have significant character flaws, really rubbish lives, personal weaknesses, ineptitudes – no skills at all – to qualify for being in poverty.
A report from ThanAtos, the private company hired by the government to assess people to see if they are genuinely on the point of death from starvation in order to be eligible for poverty, says that many are just feigning starvation and despair and some are even faking thinness. ThanAtos’s research shows that many expect to be provided with food bank vouchers so they can continue to be parked on luxury standards of suffering indefinitely. The report said:
Far too many of those who claim they are poor don’t even have a plasma screen and a sky dish, and we know for a fact that they don’t eat takeaways, take drugs, smoke or drink cheap cider, they lack personal ineptitudes, and many don’t even have loads of unkempt children, so they are just frauds. The problem is that once people see the privilege and benefits of gnawing hunger and destitution, they all want some. It’s all supply-led, people just want poorness as a freebie.
It’s certainly set a trend.
Being poor is so popular that the marginalised wealthy have launched a backlash because languishing in poverty is such a self-indulgent lifestyle choice, especially when the economy is growing. We all know that poor people cost the economy lots of money, as Mr Cameron says. Somehow. And we know that the struggling millionaires are very low-maintenance, economically, requiring only a few meagre tax breaks, like the one of £107,000 each per annum, just to keep them going. A millionaire spokesperson, Samuel Smiles, said:
“These poor people have taken the easy, stress-free option of not sending their children up chimneys and into t’mills any more and won’t even try their hand at pick-pocketing and prostitution. Those were once respected pauper activities, but now these poor people are jumping on the band-waggon and tarnishing the good name of thrift, self-help and state-inflicted misery.”
Another spokeperson for wealthy people, Thomas Malthus, said that being rich is fraught with potentially embarrassing socialising difficulties as other people’s exclusive and privileged poverty inspires much outrage, envy, sanctimonious and unfortunate, pretentious one -downmanship from wealthy people, especially at dinner parties. Many have resorted to hiding their posh Le Creuset sets and Agas in the garage, and using a camping stove for all three courses. Growing numbers of the traumatised wealthy have tragically ended up in retail therapy.
Yes, we know we have to help the disadvantaged and hard-done-by wealthy, they need our support and of course, every penny counts. If only they could see that they need us and as much as we need them. We paupers wouldn’t be where we are today if it wasn’t for the wealthy. But we do deserve our special social status.
The fact remains that they bring it all on themselves. I’m not without sympathy but these wealthy people don’t try hard enough to make do, go without and downsize. I do agree that the government needs to support them with some educational classes to help them achieve the skills required to become poorer. Since poor people need to learn both self-denial and total selfishness, it requires a special talent, and is admittedly difficult to emulate. But many think the wealthy deserve all they get, because they are lazy and just give up, parked on their wealth for life. Poverty is not luck, it’s something you really have to work at. And the new nothing for something culture helps almost everyone into poverty, so there are no excuses for the feckless rich, it’s never been easier to be poor.
But having been denied access to poverty all of their lives, many of the wealthy have decided to become experts on it instead. It’s fueled by the politics of envy, but at least it allows rich people to feel a little included on the periphery of covetable poverty experiences. Many have suggested we don’t have any cookery skills, so it’s not a lack of money but the inability to cook imaginary rice puddings from scratch that creates the privilege of poverty. But that’s untrue, as many paupers endeavor to create all of their fabulous meals every day from nothing at all.
The choice between relative deprivation and downsizing to absolute poverty presents us with a particularly tricky dilemma. It is only the very truly brave and liberated that opt to take the plunge. Unless of course you are one of those lucky people that have inherited your poverty from your parents. Some people are blessed with good genes and don’t have to work at it. But they are the lucky few.
Then there’s the culture of entitlement, it’s the same thing as Margaret Thatcher’s culture of deprivation, only it’s been amended so that we don’t make wealthy folk feel inadequate and alone in their tragic lives of undeserved, much-needed handouts and empty lifestyles – getting something for nothing. It must be so unfulfiling to have all of your needs met and still have a big surplus of money. What a nightmare. No wonder the rich are so envious of our nothing for something culture. So much so that denial is their defence mechanism of choice. And who can blame them.
Poor people everywhere welcome the government’s move to cut the numbers of the moderately wealthy and lift them into poverty, and many have praised David Cameron for ensuring that ordinary people now have equal opportunities when it comes to accessing poverty.
Record numbers of poor people are achieving being very poor, according to Mr Osborne, though he said we’ve a way to go before we hit the targets set by the Office for Victorian Era Fiscal Parsimony, but by the end of this parliament, we should be on track. The Institute of Misery confirmed these findings. However, the Institute of Economic Farce have said that their predicted targets were far exceeded.
It’s so fashionable, being poor. I watched a fashion programme on the TV, in-between all the soaps and Oprah, called “On the catwalk this week.” We saw a new range of designs called “Pauper”, emulating the fabulously poor Gutterati, which is similar to the grunge of the early Tory 90’s, but with more on-trend rags, holes and longer-term wearability. Accessories included funky cardboard boxes, park benches with stylish newspaper edging and a shop doorway with punky spikes. It’s in vogue to wear your suffering on your tattered sleeves, with minimalist foot wear.
One model was heard screaming obscenities at a journalist, after being accused, insultingly, of having anorexia. She said proudly that she was authentically poor and starving because she chose to do workfare at a Gentlemen’s club, when the Department of Work and Pensions offered her a fashionable, must-have benefit sanction. She was then sent on workfare to the modelling agency, and is very grateful for the opportunity to have nothing at all.
But columnist Hate E Bopkins said: “That’s a big fat lie, she’s a fraud, we all know that poor people get fat because they eat nothing but takeaways, black puddings, pie and chips and they can skillfully mismanage their meagre money to good effect, they’re pros, damn the cunning blighters.
We all know it’s only the scrounging and disadvantaged wealthy that have that tiresome, excessive energy and unfortunate and unfashionable money to eat that dreadful fresh fruit and veg, healthy rubbish and be seen slim at the gym. The culturally shameful and depraved creatures. How I wish I could be really poor. I’d love to have nothing at all, ideally.”
Ms Bopkins recommends we buy takeaways and eat really great unwholesome foods like pie and chips, whilst watching soaps and Jeremy Kyle on the telly. Oh, and avoid porridge like the plague. (Although plague, pneumonia, bad teeth and TB may well be set to become the new luxe accessories for poor people this season, according to top fashionistas such as Oxfam and the Joseph Rountree Foundation).
Jamie Oliver, amongst others, says that poor people always have a very large plasma TV. Thanks for that great tip, Jamie. If you bought one whilst in work, you should get rid of it immediately and buy an even larger one from your benefit. You must also subscribe to Sky and get a big dish put on your house. Trade in your furniture and household items the very moment you stop working, and buy them all again so you don’t have to live with the guilt and shame of having anything you may have (inadvertently, I’m sure) bought from what you once disgracefully earned.
Another top tip is have lots of children that you can’t afford. Poor people need to get pregnant only once they are absolutely broke. Never plan your children when you are in work, or down and out in prosperity, that’s a big no-no. Make sure you lose the job, house and everything else first. Wealthy people will feel included in this lifestyle choice and you can provide opportunity for a suffering wealthy person to share their outrage. It’s therapeutic for them, helping to alleviate their sense of shame and inadequacy.
One of the greatest joys of being poor is that everyone else has got generous and seemingly endless advice for you. There are lots of sound tips around on how to get on with being poor quietly. And the media are interested in sharing all the details of your private life with the public, so they can tut, have some outrage, grumble, seethe and foam a lot, and then give you their advice. It’s because they are so envious of your lucky life experiences that many are thinking of becoming disabled, just so they can share our exclusive pauper status for themselves. They want to own your poverty and I suspect they’d like to commercialise it. But we know that the poor invented poverty, and it’s ours.
Another poverty tip is take expensive holidays abroad, walk your dog if you have one and go to the pub. You must make sure you get someone to take photos of you looking busy and happy and post on facebook, or better still, send them to the Department of Work and Pensions.
Many Sun and Daily Mail readers erroneously think that disabled poor people aren’t allowed to do anything at all that looks normal, they get very distressed and outraged that you aren’t suffering enough, so they will kindly report you. Strictly in your best interests of course, because to these kind, unprejudiced, well-meaning souls, there’s nothing more important than ensuring your complete sacrifice and suffering, and it’s the surest way of getting your benefit stopped, then you can get on with wallowing in your hard-won destitution, suffering and absolute poverty. Because as this thrifty government of self-helping, help themselves specialists has demonstrated, you’re absolutely worth it.
Thanks to Robert @LivingstonePics
Thought you should know that the following has been posted about you on facebook today (not my page i should add) But a facebook user and activist with a host of contacts across Britain, all of whom will now have read this :
“And the ‘spook of the year award’ goes to Sue Jones (below). She hosts a blog under the name of ‘kittysjones’ which she uses to disemminate fabrications against organisations on the left. She appears to being ‘run’ by Scotland Yard’s Confidential Intelligence Unit. Remember her role is to collect information about you and to spread lies and plant false stories about the British left, as can be seen in her latest blog entry. Now she’s been ‘outed’ her capacity to do harm will soon thankfully be over – hope she spent her ’30 pieces’ wisely
http://powerbase.info/index.php/Confidential_Intelligence_Unit
As far as threats go, this is one of the more bizarre from the Green Party membership that I have received. Nonetheless it is still a shameful attempt at intimidation and an attempt to discredit. And furthermore, it’s a lie of course – typical of the ongoing green smear campaign that I’ve been subjected to for the past couple of years. Other smears include I have 500 fake profiles, and numerous people, some that I didn’t even know, have actually been accused of being me and have been bullied. I’ve been called a “retard,” a “tranni” and a “Labour troll” amongst many other things.
Bravo. This Green gets the Thug of the Year Award.
Henry’s email address, which appears on my notification of his comment, along with his IP address, is: greendragonnews@gmail.com
This one was sent as a personal message on Facebook:
Conversation started Tuesday
12/23, 11:07pm
The word is youre on a retainer from people in the british nuclear industry Ms Jones? Is this true? It’s certainly a very serious charge, and one which you should be very concerned about Ms Jones.
Nothing worse than being publicly tarred a ‘snout’ for the British State.
Have a very merry christmas wont you – and pass on yuletide regards to your friends PC Mark Kennedy and co.
Yeah, you’d think the “retainer” would have stretched to a new laptop, posh blog site and a decent fake ID, wouldn’t you. And surely I wouldn’t be a Labour Supporter, one that particularly sticks my head so conspicuously above the parapet, often. How very dare I, eh?
Then there were the threats of “libel”:
Robert Price says:
December 23, 2014 at 2:53 pm
As a lawyer I know what proper construction means in terms of the laws of libel; the law is clear to me in this issue. What confuses me, as someone who thought you a writer who shared many of my values and concerns for the nation we live in, is why you’ve written this. People are often more complex than the law.
In see my previous comments are still awaiting moderation. You have moderated this comment and not those. I do hope that isn’t a further attempt to misrepresent either my character, or those of other Green Party members. Sue, Ms Jones, I don’t understand why you write something so clearly defamatory.
Robert Price says:
December 23, 2014 at 3:11 pm
You’ve defamed the character of an identifiable group of which I am a member. I haven’t threatened you. Quite the opposite, I simply remain bemused you should do this, and further troubled that you choose only certain items to allow in counter argument.
It appears that is the way it must stand on this page. You have made it clear what your position is. I am most disconcerted. Perhaps the advice or counsel of a colleague might help. I don’t think I wish to informerly communicate with you further. I also believe there is little chance of you allowing the unmoderated items to be seen.
(The sheer volume of responses to moderate meant there was a huge backlog, many were abusive and some were pretty foul. It took me ages to wade through them. Those comments made most recently are those which appear at the top of the notifications list)
This was one response:
Mike Sivier says:
December 24, 2014 at 1:32 am
I’d like to interject a word of warning to Mr Price and anyone else who wants to try their luck with defamation claims: You are not libelled by this article. Any attempt at legal action against the author would be laughed out of court if it even got that far. The laws on defamation are very clear and so are the defences against inaccurate accusations; the author of this blog is, legally, stating honest opinions based on clear evidence. If Mr Price really is a lawyer, then he should know better.
(Several commentators claimed the article was “libelous” and “defamatory”.)
And the more traditional “we know here you live” kind of threats:
copthis says:
December 24, 2014 at 8:10 am
You think you seen bulling and threats but you aint seen nuthing yet. thats a promise. you cant hope to get away with drivel like this and not expect a payback. they are coming
growsome says:
December 24, 2014 at 1:35 pm
stop playing the victim. Your entire peice is an appalling smear and people have a right to be angry with you. you deserve a kicking and thats what you get. its overdue. many of us hate you and your lame posts about labour but you never stop. labour are fascists with neoliberal policies and your to stupid a bint to see it. now shut the fuck up.
In reply to Mandy:
Anonymous says:
December 26, 2014 at 10:39 am
could not have put it better myself
Other comments were rather more crass and vulgar, I’ll spare you those. Others condoned the threats and abuse, claiming they were warranted because the article was “hysterical, smearing, desperate, shit…” (critical.)
Sample of comments on Facebook:
Rhionna Mackay written by a deluded labour supporter I see.
Francis Farmer Sue Jones your full of shit …. fuck you, you lying shit cunt….
I wrote a critical article, instead of engaging with the issues in the article, people largely decided to attack me, attack the Labour party, lie about them and behave like thugs. This doesn’t bode well for the Green Party’s general accountability, transparency and democratic engagement, does it? Nor does it demonstrate principles of ethics and social equality. In short, it’s not much of a “real socialist” response.
This is the only article I have written about Green ideology and I’ve written going on for 300 articles in the past couple of years. During that past couple of years, the pro-Labour articles have attracted the attention of a group of hostile Green supporters. This incident is by no means a one-off. I don’t mind debate and criticism, even “heated debate”, but this is not that. Some of the personal attacks made on me around Facebook have shocked friends (some are also Green Party members, I should add) because of how vicious and vindictive they have been. Not that it’s ever stopped me from doing what I do. And it never will.
But since when did this become acceptable behaviour? I know I am not the only person that has experienced this, too. Political beliefs and preferences are not an excuse for bullying.
Time and time again I see Green Party members lying about or misrepresenting Labour’s policies. Yet when that is reasonably challenged and evidence for that challenge is presented, abuse and threats follow, instead of reasoned debate.
It is important to contextualise ideologies, which don’t arise in a vacuum, but rather, they develop over time in a context of dominant paradigms and economic/social conditions. You don’t need me to tell you the dangers of far-right ideologies, sure, yet we live in times when fascism is again on the rise, globally, and when far-right parties such as UKIP have gained support in our own Country.
We live in times when it’s become acceptable for the poor to be left without support, and people are dying because of benefit sanctions and cuts. We live in times when it’s acceptable to demonise minority social groups all over again – to ‘other’ them. I have drawn parallels with Nazi ideology and propaganda techniques in other articles, using Allport’s scale of prejudice to indicate that the same process is unfolding here, stage by stage. As a disabled person, I feel this acutely. We live in times when bullying and oppressing others who disagree with you is acceptable, too. That’s not remotely “socialist”: it has nothing to do with the core principles of co-operation, community ideals, rationality and solidarity.
The Greens and Labour ought to be able to find more commonalities than differences. Both parties need to be focused on attacking the Tories and their destructive policies. Yet this past two years, at least, I have seen the Greens attack Labour rather than attempt to build bridges.
There’s another important point concerning how the current electoral system stands. Any split amongst the left-wing voters will ensure another 5 years of the Tories. That can not and MUST not happen. For me, that is the most pressing issue we face. Because if the Tories remain in Office after May 7th, 2015, there won’t be anything left of our society to fight for. If you think things are bad now, just wait until the Conservatives repeal Labour’s Human Rights Act and withdraw from the ECHR, as they have promised .
Those same human rights were formulated internationally as the basis of establishing decent codes of conduct for democratic governments, as a response to the atrocities of world war two and fascist governments, such as the Nazis and the Stalinist regime.
I have no problem with genuine criticism, and no party is above that. However, many of the Green’s constant and often unwarranted attacks on Labour are not founded on truth and facts and are not helping to achieve anything. For me, it’s pretty unforgivable that some people are purposefully undermining our chances of being rid of the authoritarian Tory-led Coalition. People are suffering and dying now as a consequence of policies. That did not happen under the last government. The only viable option we currently have to ensure the Tories are outed is a Labour vote. That’s basic maths and the way the current electoral system is, which is not my doing.
We need to escape this Tory-designed perdition first, then we can discuss the finer points of personal utopias and debate what constitures “real socialist principles.” And aside from that, a genuinely socialist approach entails the basic recognition that the outcome of our own vote doesn’t simply affect ourselves: it profoundly affects everyone.
We need to learn from our collective history, too.
Related
A Few Words About Respect – Mike Sivier
The Green Party’s women problem – Neil Schofield
Sticks and stones: abusive labels, self concept – when words become weapons